Thursday, March 15, 2012

Enjoy the Death of the Planet

I'm a bit surprised by the lack of outrage over the weather we've been having the last few days.  I mean, unseasonably mild pre-spring days are what are killing the planet.  As any of the artists formerly known as "Global Warming Alarmists" would tell you, high temperatures nearly double the norms show that we have gone beyond the point of no return in preventing Global Climate Change.  Yesterday alone will probably add 0.00001 of a degree to the mean planetary temperature for 2012--continuing a rising trend that started about 12-thousand years ago when our Cro-Magnon ancestors started campfires that added pollution to the atmosphere and caused the glaciers to recede and melt--freeing Northeast Wisconsin from the 2-mile sheet of ice that had covered it for thousands of years.

What's more, not only were people not concerned about the abnormally warm weather--they seemed to be celebrating it!  Everywhere you went you heard "Wow, what a beautiful day!" or "I'll take this weather in March every year!"  Don't these people know the irreparable damage that was done to the environment yesterday?  Instead of going out to play at recess, our public school students should have been kept inside to watch videos about the loss of ice shelves in the Arctic that threatens the polar bears.  I bet those kids wouldn't be so excited to not have to wear their jackets and hats.

Of course, this warm spell comes at end of a winter that was already among the mildest since guys started keeping track of that stuff in the 1800's.  Sure, it meant lower home heating bills, less demand for low-income assistance and decreased energy use--but somewhere a species of coral disappeared as ocean temps increased one half a degree.  Sure hope that was worth hardly ever having to use the snowblower.

So go out in your shorts and t-shirts, hit the golf courses a month earlier than usual and take a walk in the bright sun in the park.  Just remember your killing the planet.

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